Prom Spot - How to Get out of Any Situation With a Guy

You are never trapped. You always have options. Always. Whatever situation you’re in -- however awkward or embarrassing it seems at the time -- there is an escape route. Here’s your map.

If he gets a hotel room...
Your guy may want to have sex on prom night, but that's his business -- you don't have to go along with the plan! Even if you've been dating forever, prom night and sex rarely mix well. There's just too much excitement -- it's not the best time to make big decisions. And all the expectations...it's a lot of pressure for one night! Your guy may tell you prom is a night for romance, but what are the odds that your feeling ready will coincide with some school dance?
Your exit plan: Make things easiest on yourself by doing damage control early on. Convince the other members of your prom group that not only are hotel rooms expensive, but that heading out somewhere else together will be even more fun. If he insists on paying for the room or promises there will be other people there, be direct about not wanting a room. Then, if he gets one anyway, tell him that night that your parents have imposed a curfew and leave it at that. You're always free to go.

If he wants you to drink...
No matter how good a time he seems to be having now, fast-forward a few hours and he could be acting like an embarrassing, loud moron, or worse, doubled over, puking into a bush. If you want to remember your prom (and look good in your pictures), don't drink. If he tries to pressure you and is disregarding how uncomfortable he's making you feel, then he probably doesn't have the best intentions (even if he's a "nice" guy). He might want you to drink because he knows alcohol is likely to wear down your resolve and good judgment -- which makes it easier for him to persuade you to hook up.
Your exit plan: If your date keeps offering you alcohol, don't beat around the bush. Simply say that you don't like the taste. If you blame it on your taste buds, it's not like anyone can blame you. Then show everyone that drinking does not equal fun by tearing up the dance floor with your date. And while his coordination may be a little off, you'll be energized enough to dance the whole night through.

If he insists on paying for everything...
While it may seem like an easy way out, letting your date pay for the whole prom could be a trap in disguise. Is he really that generous or is something else going on here? Just remember, you don't owe him anything -- if he took out his wallet, well, nobody forced him to.
Your exit plan: If your date offers to spring for the whole prom, tell him you'd rather go Dutch. Explain that you were brought up to be independent, which means you expect to pay your own way. He may be caught off guard at first, but in the end, he'll probably agree. After all, who wouldn't want to save a few bucks? If he doesn't voice his strategy ahead of time and it's prom night, pay for something -- dessert, a tank of gas -- yourself so he doesn't even try to use money as a way to pressure you. Why give him the ammo? Make it easier on yourself. Bottom line: A guy cannot buy sexual favors -- no matter how much he spends. Do not feel guilty. And just remember: Don't you deserve a guy who doesn't try to manipulate you with money? How pathetic is that?!

If he's intoxicated and wants to drive you home...
Imagine they've played the last song. You're exhausted, you can't find your friend's limo, and your only way home is to hitch a ride with your drunken date. You'd be surprised how likely you might be to get into his car because you're tired and it's convenient.
Your exit plan: You should never, under any circumstances, get into a car with a drunk driver. Tell him, "I'm going to get another ride. Brian's got his car here and he's offered to take you." (Have Brian there to back you up if you can.) Don't start with excuses, just confidently tell him the plan and assume he agrees and he'll go along with it. Then call your parents and have them pick you up.

If he uses the “once-in-a-lifetime” trap...
The thought of slipping into a glitzy gown is pretty exciting, so it's not surprising that some guys will use the "once-in-a-lifetime" angle to try to get you to stay out late or hook up. But prom is not the end-all be-all event people will have you think it is. There are plenty more parties and fabulous events in your future!
Your exit plan: Refuse to feel pressured -- he's just a guy and this is only a dance. Think "big picture." Your safety, health, and happiness -- as cheesy as that sounds -- are much more important in the long-term. If he whines and says, "Come on, it’s prom. When are we ever going to be together like this again, with all our friends, all dressed up? Isn't it romantic, at least?" Tell him, "I didn't know you thought prom was such a big deal! I agree, it's pretty fantastic, but I plan on attending awesome parties for the rest of my life. So I'm sorry, but this just doesn't feel like the right moment to me."

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--Elina Furman